Now you can have the pleasure of having the most wonderful fragrance that has come into the world in recent times.
All you need do is push the plunger on the top of the Designer Balloney Bottle, the fragrance is shot out our exclusive expulsion ports.
You'll receive a wonderful Designer Balloney Bottle containing the precious fragrance, a fragrance described as something delicate like a humid afternoon in New York City, the invigorating odor of moist tennis shoes outside the trailer park, and the sensory sharpening smell of pepper spray.
Be the first in your neighborhood to own the most sought after fragrance from the most sought after designer of our time! This is a limited time offer! Act now, we'll have to leave town soon!
Designer Balloney Fragrance is guaranteed toilet water!
Cher - Singer, Big Time Entertainer "I've never smelled anything like this stuff."
Jon Tokensulk - Battalion Chief LA Fire Dept.- Toxic Waste Specialist "We've determined this material not to be hazardous in small quantities."
Gloria Allready - Lawyer for Billy Balloney "I don't believe that the current lawsuits will have any validity in court. I think my client will be found innocent of any poisoning charges. That guy probably passed out from something else like diesel exhaust."
General Norman Shwartzkoff - U.S. Army Ret. "I wish we'd had a weapon like this in Iraq!"